every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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