if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
