plz talk dirty to me
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
