Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
