Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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