Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
