I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
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