There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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