yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize