He is an equal opportunity slut.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
