i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Don't make out with my wife yet
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
