i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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