Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
