I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
