Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Randomize
