They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize