You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Randomize
