Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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