You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
