maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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