matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
