just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
