ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
