We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
