8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
and you fell through a lawn chair
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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