i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
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