Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
