We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
