Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
