Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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