i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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