he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
