i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
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