I hate all girls vehemently.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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