eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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