going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
