i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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