hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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