hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
should my penis look like a turkey
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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