what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
did i walk over a car last night?
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
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