Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
