Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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