Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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