What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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