Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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