You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
