just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
