I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
