I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
