Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize