i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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