You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Randomize